New Beginnings

6-sep-16

“Every day is a new beginning… Take a deep breath and start again”

In the mayan calendar today we start with the Red Dragon Wavespell, which marks the Power of Birth and New Beginnings.

I woke up today feeling a little bit nervous. I am flying to Oaxaca, Mexico, a place that I’ve wanted to visit for a while. I feel as if this is a longer trip than it actually is. I’m only going for 10 days but for some reason it feels a little bit like a goodbye in some ways. I woke up feeling a little bit nervous today… and I think the reason is because it does mark a different stage in my life. Not the trip itself, but the feelings I have.

Yesterday I went to sleep looking around in my room and snuggling in my bed, enjoying them fully and thinking that it was going to be the last night in 10 days that I sleep in my cozy bed :P. This morning it was kind of hard to let it go! I didn’t want to wake up. I wanted to prolong the time I could stay laying there feeling the warmth & comfort of it. I finally stood up, thinking that I actually haven’t felt this kind of material attachment in a while.

For the first time in almost 4 months I haven’t had the solo traveller feeling I am having today; the feeling of starting something new, of going out there to explore, of taking chances and being open to allow new things to happen… but most importantly, the feeling of letting go of my comfort zone.

Yes’ I’ve been kind of in a comfort zone for a while. I’be been enjoying my family and my time at home, but recently I’ve also been pushed to a situation that has brought me to think: When are you actually gonna start to live again? When was the last time that you felt that your life was going amazingly well? Personally and professionally speaking? Well, I’ve had my ups and downs of course; nothing is fully black or white. But today I had again this weird sensation <somehow addictive> where you are preparing for your flight and it feels like if you are preparing for a life change as if finally I’m ready to literally take-off, in all senses.

It takes you out of the box, yes. It makes you feel nervous because you can’t see what’s ahead, yes. But boy it feels good. It feels fresh. It feels new. And new it’s always good – all changes are.

So while I’m on the plane, overlooking the deserted landscape of my city, I know that when I come back, when I fly over this same piece of land again in a few days time, I won’t be the same person who left. I will be renewed. I will be ready and open for whatever life has for me… and I can’t wait 🙂

 

I opened this envelope (there’s still a few left unopened) with the initial emotion being first that one… but after reading the message and writing my thoughts, it suddenly changed to feeling pretty enthusiastic about what’s coming.

So, thank God for written therapy:)

~^~

Until the next time, dear London town

2-Mar-2015

In the Aztec calendar is Cipactli (crocodile) Day and is governed by Tonacatecuhtli, Lord of Nurturance as its provider of Tonali, the Shadow Soul-Ka of life energy. Cipactli is an auspicious day, signifying advancement and honor. It depicts energy & work, rewards & recognition. A GOOD DAY FOR BEGINNINGS.

Feeling eternally grateful, London, you’ve changed my life… Not only changed it but defined it. I am leaving a piece of my heart in every corner where I walked by and in every person that I ever came across with. My friends whom I deeply love & my yoga space kept me balance.

8.00am – I find myself in my empty room in London. It is empty but somehow I can feel I left a bit of me here. I just cannot believe yet that this is the last time I will be sleeping in this bed, looking through this window & being in between these walls that can certainly tell a story or two. Is this even real? Am I going to wake up some day and realize this is all a dream? Oh well, it is a dream well worth dreaming – what is reality anyway?

I say “good-bye” to my flatmate, my lovely german girl whom I´ve enjoyed my last few weeks with, sharing great moments and trying to eat London in one bite for the “last time”. Today she gave a very meaningful gift to me; it kind of makes me feel we are traveling together. They are a few little envelopes which are hiding encouraging thoughts that I can read every time I feel the need to “get by with a little help from my friends” ♪: “Feeling happy”, “Feeling love pain”, “Thinking too much”… I know they are all waiting there for the right moment.

9.15am – I am out of the door getting into the taxi that would bring me to the airport. The driver is Indian and we talked for an hour and a half. It was a nice company and time flew, like when having coffee with a friend. I kept seeing his eyes through the rear view mirror, tired but gentle eyes. We arrived and said good-bye, and for some reason I felt like hugging him. I guess he felt the same way…. We hugged.

5-Mar-2015

1.10pm – I open my first envelope on the plane towards my destination: India. I am about to take off. The envelope reads:

“Being nervous isn´t bad. It just means something important is happening.”

With a smile on my face, I know that the beginning of a great adventure is just about to start.