Writings in a New Moon

Jul 24^th 2017 0.00 hours

New moon is here. I have been expecting it for a while. Unconsciously I knew it was going to be special somehow, although I didn’t imagine how. I buried some very special crystals on the ground last night and will leave them to take some grounding and loving energy from Mother Earth until they are ready for their purpose.

I woke up today at 6am with this huge, immense pain in my lower belly. My period arrived and to begin with, I was a bit resistant about it coming in a New Moon because in the last years it had been beautifully synchronized with the Full Moon.

I think with all the travels and time zone changes, etc., it started to move slowly until it turns out that it now begins in a New Moon. According to what I’ve read and heard, this should actually be the period of ovulation, so basically, I’m switched.

I had a strange dream where one of my best friends who has known me for about 25 years, expressed something about me that I did not agree with. I wanted her to change her opinion about me so I wrote her a message explaining her why it wasn’t like that and also making her feel guilty about it. When I woke up, I realized that the thoughts I was having while writing this message in my dream were actually confirming what my friend thought about me there. It got me thinking all day: Where does the dream stops and where does “reality” begins?

Despite the tough start of the day, the rest of it went quite well as I did my best to take it slowly and stress-free. But in the evening when coming home, I had a reminder. A reminder for something very important that I have to do, and was about to let it go and “forget” about it. I was ‘this close’ to ignore it and keep on with my comfort, avoiding any sort of chaos that could come certain decisions that are necessary for my own growth. It was a huge revelation, not because I didn’t know it, but because it came in the perfect moment.

I then had to be reminded that New Moons are Moons for New Beginnings. New Moons are an opportunity to grow, plant your seeds on very steady ground and take care of them until the time comes for them to bloom. New Moons are for INTENTIONS…

And yes, they are challenging too, because if you go through them unconsciously, then unconsciously you will plant unwanted seeds. Or you will be asleep during this very important manifestation time.

I sincerely ask today that whatever is inside of me that does not serve me anymore, find its way out… so that the wishes that are really deep in my heart can find their way in. ❤

Thank You to the souls and events that helped me open my eyes today in this special day, inspiring me to remain true to myself, no matter what.

Magic in a Full Moon day

23-Jan-2016

Today was the first Full Moon of the year. Quite a strong one. Whether you felt it or not, or better said, whether if you were conscious of its effects or not, this day has definitely created some movement. I like to believe movement is always for the best, although sometimes it comes with heavy baggage and lessons to be learned.

For me, it has been more of an “awakening” to stuff I was not probably seeing very clearly. I have been questioning myself lots of things, not too much looking for answers about myself, but more in regards to how my relationships with other people is at the moment. And strangely enough I’m not talking about friends, family or couple relationships, but those that happen with complete strangers: How am I in those kind of relationships? Which role I play or like to play? Which role I’m avoiding? Am I judgmental of their actions? Am I understanding? Am I protecting myself too much or am I approachable enough to others? Can others learn and take something nice out of a spare moment shared with me or am I not even close to transmit such a thing? What am I doing right, what am I doing wrong?

These couple of days have brought to me all sorts of questions and self-reflections about the role I’m playing right now in my life with people. I want this year to be based on people, not on things, not on places… on people. So today’s full moon has been unconsciously a great opportunity to reflect upon it.

I won’t be able to tell exactly the effects this moon has had over me, probably until I fully experiment those effects, but because it has been an important day for me and because I LOVE the mystic side of this beautiful big round star, I will share what I have learned of it today, from a couple of different sites.

“Many of us may feel like we’ve literally been thrown to the wolves during the month of January. The planetary energy has been rocky and the start to 2016 has been anything but smooth. We can thank Mercury retrograde coupled with some other intense planetary combinations for that.” http://www.elephantjournal.com/2016/01/januarys-full-moon-throw-me-to-the-wolves-ill-come-back-to-lead-the-pack/

That explains my craaaazy start of January, as I have never had so many changes in my itinerary and my “perfectly planned” life as I’ve had in the last 2 weeks. But I’m all good. Thankfully the changes have been all for good (or this is how I’m choosing to take them) so I’ve been embracing the change quite well I have to say… and actually enjoying it!

I also found a beautiful Full Moon ritual that I followed step-by-step yesterday and I feel so so happy as I did it with all my heart and I actually received a nice message in my dream, at 3am in the morning. I woke up, wrote my dream before I fell back to sleep, and now its there on writing – Somehow it feels more real like that. I share this ritual in case you want to do it – I have read somewhere that the moon strong effect lasts for about 2 days (before and after) the actual Full Moon Day, so there is still time! Enjoy:)

First of all reflect upon the following:

“Themes of the January 23rd full moon in Leo are: -Standing apart. -Courage. -Letting go. -Seeing the unseen. -A wise and powerful woman becoming illuminated.”

“The Full Moon is always a time of illumination, and during these deep Mercury Retrograde days of revisiting, restructuring and rebuilding, it’s important that we take note of what we are seeing.

-Are we in alignment with our truth? -With our wisdom? -Do we honor our wisdom or do we defer to “experts?”

“Full Moon Ritual: Accessing Your Wisdom.

1) Take some time to bathe yourself in the moonlight. Allow yourself to simply be at rest and to soak up the rays of the Full Moon.

2) Use a fresh page in your journal to answer these questions:

-What am I the goddess of?  –What areas of life do I rule? –What is my deepest wisdom? –How can I apply my wisdom more widely? –Who can I share it with?

3) Place your writing on your altar or sacred space. Nearby, light a candle in a power color (red, orange or purple) and allow it to burn all the way down (if you can’t let it burn all the way, then snuff it out (rather than blowing out the flame). Keep lighting and snuffing out the candle until it has burned entirely.

4) Ask your guides for a dream message on how to more fully step into your power before you go to sleep. Upon waking, write down what you remember of your dream, even if it is just one tiny snippet.

Stand in your strength and honor your wisdom. Athena has your back.” http://www.elephantjournal.com/2016/01/full-moon-in-leo-the-goddess-of-applied-wisdom/

And last but not least, some affirmations to make you feel strong, courageous, safe and with full potential in this beautiful and powerful day. My personal message from here was:

I am at home – I breathe – My heart is warm, its safe.

What’s yours? http://embodiedastrology.com/2016/01/22/leo-full-moon-horoscope-affirmations/

I finished my day joining a circle of beautiful yogis and doing a ritual to honour this day. We brought intentions & physical objects to cleanse and offer. We cleaned the space with nice energy, did a couple of moon salutations bringing energy inwards and then offering energy outwards. It finished with a closed-eye meditation, next to some people I’ve known for a while and whom I love, and some others who I just started to get to know but are teaching me so much already.

This day could not have ended better than the way it did: jumping into the water, the infinity pool that I have been overlooking for the last weeks, and floating face up, looking and contemplating the wonders of the sky.

Happy Full Moon 🙂

Namaste.

Expectations – yours or mine?

10-Aug-2015

Life is full of expectations… We are full of expectations. People expect us to do certain things, to be certain people, to act in a certain way in public, to do what it’s ‘right’ for society in order to fill their own ideals. We all have them, and since we are little this is what they taught us to look at, and it’s ok! sometimes we need guidelines and someone to shed some light from the distance, but it’s just that… these freaking expectations… they are making a lot of noise around me.

I am not a mother, but I have friends with children. I’ve had the blessing of baby sitting for one of my best friends a few times in the last months. I always enjoy these moments as being surrounded by children who are brought up in some much love it’s so beautiful to see, and I completely love it. But, BUT, I also realized so closely for the very first time what a huge responsibility that is! It’s like suddenly your “me” time is completely gone, vanished, adiós. From one day to another your biggest priority in life is your children and the daily education you give to them, teaching them how to eat, how to behave, how to have schedules and disciple, when it’s ok to sleep or to scream or to play, and when it’s not… when to show their anger, when to show love, when and how to control their emotions… Wow, just by thinking about it I am already exhausted.

But even if I would really want to know how this situation is in real life, I don’t actually know (just yet), so I can’t really talk about it. And if you are wondering what the hell all this has to do with expectations, well,  what I’m just sitting down here for is to try to remember: When was the very first moment in life in which we started setting up expectations in our children, parents, jobs, friends, lovers? even strangers!? And at some point it just gets so out of control that this concept ends up affecting the way we move through life.

I don’t know if I’m just going through a time of my life that will pass soon, but lately the situations that I have been into seem a little bit of a test to me: people around me getting engaged, getting married, getting children, getting dogs, getting a house, getting their life sorted. My dear parents and I having fights because it’s difficult for them to understand my way of living (or probably because I have not been able to explain to them properly). And then getting even more fights when we start talking about my personal life:  “Mom, I might never married”, “I don’t know mom, I don’t even have a boyfriend right now”, “Mom, I’m happy! my happiness doesn’t depend on finding some-one”, “Mom, if I marry, it might not be in the catholic church… I don’t even know if the guy will have the same religion as me and I don’t really care”, “Yes Mom, I am 29 now, but I feel young!”… “Mom, please don’t cry” 😦

My mother is the most amazing woman I know and she has been the biggest key to open many doors in my life AND I love her deeply. But I am scared of disappointing her. First, me getting out of a stable job from an investment bank in London – the dream job for many, the dream city for many more… Ok, that took her time (took THEM time, because my dad was part of it too even if he wants to deny it). And now, with my love life not going anywhere at the moment, and my ideas of marriage and kids and families and houses changing in directions I never thought they will…

I wish that no one ever had taught us about expectations. They are just a slow road to disappointment for the subject involved, but an even more painful one for the part that is setting the expectations on you, either consciously or unconsciously. It’s painful when you don’t want to hurt, but still you have to, unless you want to hurt yourself by not being true to yourself. However, sometimes I do think: Is it possible that maybe I was expecting the same for myself in the first place? Is it possible that I am still expecting that and I will end up hurting no one but myself? Maybe that is it, but I guess I will know when the time comes where I have to make such big decisions for my life. For now they are just ideas, thoughts, feelings of how I think it will be. I am curious of how the reality will turn out to be.

Until the next time, dear London town

2-Mar-2015

In the Aztec calendar is Cipactli (crocodile) Day and is governed by Tonacatecuhtli, Lord of Nurturance as its provider of Tonali, the Shadow Soul-Ka of life energy. Cipactli is an auspicious day, signifying advancement and honor. It depicts energy & work, rewards & recognition. A GOOD DAY FOR BEGINNINGS.

Feeling eternally grateful, London, you’ve changed my life… Not only changed it but defined it. I am leaving a piece of my heart in every corner where I walked by and in every person that I ever came across with. My friends whom I deeply love & my yoga space kept me balance.

8.00am – I find myself in my empty room in London. It is empty but somehow I can feel I left a bit of me here. I just cannot believe yet that this is the last time I will be sleeping in this bed, looking through this window & being in between these walls that can certainly tell a story or two. Is this even real? Am I going to wake up some day and realize this is all a dream? Oh well, it is a dream well worth dreaming – what is reality anyway?

I say “good-bye” to my flatmate, my lovely german girl whom I´ve enjoyed my last few weeks with, sharing great moments and trying to eat London in one bite for the “last time”. Today she gave a very meaningful gift to me; it kind of makes me feel we are traveling together. They are a few little envelopes which are hiding encouraging thoughts that I can read every time I feel the need to “get by with a little help from my friends” ♪: “Feeling happy”, “Feeling love pain”, “Thinking too much”… I know they are all waiting there for the right moment.

9.15am – I am out of the door getting into the taxi that would bring me to the airport. The driver is Indian and we talked for an hour and a half. It was a nice company and time flew, like when having coffee with a friend. I kept seeing his eyes through the rear view mirror, tired but gentle eyes. We arrived and said good-bye, and for some reason I felt like hugging him. I guess he felt the same way…. We hugged.

5-Mar-2015

1.10pm – I open my first envelope on the plane towards my destination: India. I am about to take off. The envelope reads:

“Being nervous isn´t bad. It just means something important is happening.”

With a smile on my face, I know that the beginning of a great adventure is just about to start.